Haiku for Matt Smith

Matt Smith, the general manager of Club Passim, is kind of my ex-spouse. And by that I mean this: technically, we were joined in a common-law marriage, given that we were roommates for about 3,000 years. It was a blast. And any of you who know Matt know exactly why.

Matt recently turned 50. (He's still trying to catch up to me.) His lovely partner (and apparently my replacement) Abby put together a book of haiku written by the many friends he has inspired and championed.

With apologies for the insider joke-ness of these, here are the haiku I submitted for consideration, inspired by the many misadventures we enjoyed while rooming together:

 

A full moon tonight 
The mailbox is taped closed 
One lonely soap dish 

The house is shaking 
And it is not yet April 
Dersham is at home 

I would like a pie 
Sauce, cheese, no dough or crust, and 
Don’t skimp on the salt! 

The simple truth is 
Everybody loves bacon 
 enough said 

Ah-ah-oh-oh 
Daddy sent them home happy 
And they cut me off 

It’s so loud, it’s so 
Loud, it’s - so you throw a bot- 
tle at my window?! 

Clang of spoon on pot 
The mail is torn and scattered 
Borax on the trash 

Dave, you best bring that 
to a rolling boil in 
the babe-worthy nook 

Spin for a draft pint 
The counter appetizers 
Shall we go ‘bone-ing? 

Good lord, he’s up there 
Cranking on the data base 
and here, not here 

Chicken of the Woods 
Walnuts instead of pine nuts 
Pesto — it’s just paste 

*

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